Press Announcement


For Immediate Release

Robert II has been promoted!

While on short leave from his job as Director and Associate General Counsel, Adobe Systems Incorporated, Robert R. Pierce, Jr. has taken a position at Pierce Family Industries as Senior Vice President of Publicity, Household Chores and Handicrafts. In taking this role at Pierce Family, Robert brings exactly 15 minutes of household experience with him, which he obtained when, once, in 1982, he made his own bed. In this newly created position, Mr. Pierce will lead a team of one in executing against the least important elements of the company’s three year plan. “In today’s dynamic environment, it’s extremely important that we have someone at Pierce Family Industries that can manage our web presence. With Robert we get someone with that expertise. We also get a leader who can haul bagloads of dirty diapers up and down 6 flights of stairs.” said Pierce Family CEO, Mira Schwirtz. One of the first projects Robert will tackle in his new role is to root out the crud in the dish washer drain accumulated there after misuse and inattention by the former Head of Chores. “I’ll do it as soon as I get a chance, but first you should take a look at my origami mobile,” said Mr. Pierce.

Pierce Family Industries, founded in 2006, is a joint venture between Schwirtz Home, Inc. and Pierce Fabrications Amalgamated.